In June 17, 2023, a female contributor took to the popular «AITA» subreddit to express her frustrations. The young woman, who was 18 years old, had been in a relationship with her boyfriend, John, who was 20 years old, for almost a year.
Although their relationship was generally healthy, there was a notable source of tension stemming from her vegetarian lifestyle. Her dedication to vegetarianism began at the age of 11, fueled by her unwavering moral convictions. However, John found one specific issue quite bothersome: her unwillingness to use her money for purchasing meat.
After she started making her own money, she made a personal commitment to not spend any of it on meat products. Their shared meals underscored this clash. Typically, the bill was divided among them, or occasionally John would foot the entire bill. She made it clear that she was willing to cover the cost for both if he decided to go with a meat-free option. Oddly enough, he rarely did. On the rare occasions when she splurged on shared experiences like concerts and festivals, he would chip in and cover the cost of her meals. When faced with these scenarios, she would spend €120+ ($125) on tickets, while he would chip in around €50 ($50) for food. What went down at the birthday dinner?
Just a few days prior to sharing her Reddit account, the young woman and her boyfriend decided to indulge in a visit to his preferred high-end restaurant to commemorate his birthday. He treated himself to the most expensive steak on the menu, accompanied by a refreshing side salad and a bottle of fine wine. After finishing their meal, the woman went up to the waiter and asked for separate bills, which caught John completely off guard. He appeared doubtful and inquired if she was kidding. She confidently stated that she was not. John was taken aback by her response. He had expected her to pay for the meal since it was his birthday, and he hadn’t planned for the expense.
Confused, she challenged his assumption, reminding him of her long-standing principle of not using her money to purchase meat. However, he didn’t offer any reasoning behind his expectation other than the fact that it happened to be his birthday. Trying to reach a compromise, the young woman suggested splitting the bill, offering to pay for the wine and side salad, while leaving her boyfriend to cover the cost of the pricey steak. Her proposition, much to his dismay, only intensified his anger, causing him to angrily storm off to the bathroom. Trying to make the best of the situation, she covered the cost of her meal, the wine, and the salad, patiently awaiting his return.
However, as time passed, he did not return. After waiting for what felt like an eternity, she made the difficult decision to leave. She couldn’t help but feel confused and bewildered by his sudden and unexplained absence. Shortly after, the person who posted the message found her boyfriend seated on a bench near their parking spot. Perplexed, she asked about his sudden departure and reminded him that he still had to settle his share of the payment. His surprise was evident; he appeared to have no knowledge of the payment she had made. After she made it clear that she had addressed all aspects except the meat, his response became quite explosive. He expressed his strong opinions, criticizing her for what he perceived as selfish behavior and encouraging her to mature.
In the face of her partner’s growing frustration, OP maintained her composure and firmly stated that it was necessary for him to go back to the restaurant and take care of the bill. Nevertheless, he dismissed her suggestion and confidently walked away. Confronted with his unwillingness to accept accountability, she made the challenging choice to drive home alone, left to deal with the consequences of his sudden outburst. In a frustrating turn of events, OP’s boyfriend pointed fingers at her for his inability to revisit his beloved restaurant, using the dine-and-dash incident as his justification. Given the restaurant’s limited capacity, it was inevitable that he would be easily identified and promptly asked to leave.
His accusations prompted her to reach out to the online community, causing her to reflect on the morality of her choices. The woman wanted to address those who had doubts about her choice not to treat her boyfriend on his birthday. She wanted to make it clear that she had gone above and beyond by using her savings to buy him a present. However, it didn’t satisfy him. The OP made it clear that she didn’t plan the dinner outing; it was actually her boyfriend’s idea to go out in the first place.