It is widely acknowledged that the arrival of grandchildren brings great joy, filling their lives with renewed energy and love. Unfortunately, the difficulties of modern life force grandparents to take on roles that go far beyond occasional babysitting, which can be bad for their own well-being. Actually, this is exactly what happened to the woman in today’s story.

This is what she said: «My son and daughter-in-law have been married for seven years. They have two children. My children have all grown up and are now leading independent lives. My husband and I are still in the workforce and it looks like retirement is still a decade or more away, possibly when we reach 70 years old.
My relationship with my daughter-in-law was much smoother before the arrival of the kids. They live just a short 30-minute drive away, and she seems to be always eager to bring them over. I thought my son knew about this, but he didn’t. He didn’t realize what was going on until I sat them down.

When I showed him all the texts asking me to babysit, he said he thought I had only done it twice this month, not sixteen times. It seems that she has been leaving them with me to spend time with friends, while my son thought she was taking the kids along.

I decided to start a group chat with my son and daughter-in-law to ensure that we all stay updated and informed. When she bombards me with messages about babysitting, I simply respond in the group chat and let my son take care of it.
During our conversation, it became clear that she values the importance of her children having a strong bond with their grandparents, just like she did when she was young. I mentioned that due to my current work commitments, it is not possible for me to have the kids every other day, as her grandparents did. We’ve finally decided to have a regular «grandma’s day» every two weeks.

Everything was going well for about a year, but now my son is traveling for work, and my daughter-in-law has reverted back to her previous behavior. My son struggles to intervene promptly due to the time difference.

One day, I had just arrived home when she unexpectedly appeared, asking me to watch the kids while she went shopping. I had reached my breaking point. I explained to her that I have my own life and that I wouldn’t fit into the mold of the grandma she had in mind. I made it clear to her that if she tried to leave the children in my care without my permission once again, I would not hesitate to contact the authorities for child abandonment.

She called me a jerk and stormed off. Later, my son called, trying to smooth things over and saying I may have gone too far. Please help me with your advice. How should I navigate through this difficult family situation.