Life can look very different depending on the country and culture you’re in. Family dynamics, expectations, and lifestyles often vary greatly from what’s common in Western cultures. This is the story of a Russian woman navigating the complexities of living with her son and daughter-in-law.

“Stepan, I don’t understand—does your mother plan to live off us? It’s been a week since she arrived, and she hasn’t contributed a single penny. You handle it however you like, but I’m not going to keep buying groceries with my own money,” Vera declared loudly.

The conversation between my son and his wife was so loud that I could hear every word. Vera clearly wasn’t happy about my return. She seemed to believe I was here to “freeload,” though that wasn’t the case—I had come back to my own apartment.

“Vera, hold on. Let Mom rest and settle in a bit, and then we can talk about money,” my son tried to calm his wife.

“You said that when she came, she’d buy us a car,” Vera added casually, without hesitation, making her plans for my money crystal clear.

Her behavior didn’t surprise me. From the very first time we met, she had shown her true colors. When Stepan brought her to introduce us, she bluntly said:
“I won’t call you ‘Mom.’ I already have a mother.”
I stayed silent; I hadn’t asked her to call me that anyway. Clearly, she wanted to establish boundaries right from the start.

After their wedding, things only got worse. Vera immediately took control of the household. If something wasn’t done her way, she made a scene. One time, she was unhappy with the soup I had made and insisted that everyone eat separately. That’s how we ended up with two refrigerators in the kitchen.

I tolerated it for a long time, but one day, I couldn’t take it anymore. I burst into tears and left the house. Sitting on a bench outside, I ran into my neighbor Tamara, who was visiting from Italy for the holidays. Over coffee, she suggested,
“Why are you putting up with this? Give the apartment to the kids and come to Italy with me. In a few years, you’ll save enough money to buy your own place.”

I had a month to think about it, and eventually, I decided to take her advice. When I told my son and daughter-in-law about my decision, they couldn’t hide their excitement. Finally, the apartment was entirely theirs, which had been Vera’s goal all along.

In four years, I managed to save enough to buy a place of my own. When I returned, I immediately purchased a two-bedroom apartment in a new development. However, my son’s joy was short-lived when he brought up money.

“Mom, Vera and I found a car we like. We need 14,000 euros. You must have the money; you did well while you were away,” he said.

“I don’t have that kind of money. I used it to buy an apartment,” I replied calmly.

He fell silent, then brightened up:
“An apartment is even better than a car. Thanks, Mom.”

But I had to disappoint him:
“The apartment is for me, son.”

After that, he didn’t speak to me for two days. Then he brought it up again:
“Alright, if you bought yourself a place, then transfer this apartment to me.”

I refused.
“You can live here as long as you like, renovate it if you want, but for now, the apartment stays in my name. You’re my only son, and one day, both apartments will be yours. But for now, this is how it will be.”

Now, according to them, I’m the stingiest mother in the world. Vera has stopped speaking to me entirely, and my son hopes I’ll change my mind.

But I’m confident I’ve made the right decision. What do you think—did I do the right thing?